I see patterns. This is much better than seeing dead people (well at least I think so), and decidedly more boring than seeing the future or the past. But my gift for patterns is somewhat intuitive and I’m in the process of learning how to harness it for all its power.
Ever since I was a little girl, I’ve seen life in unusual patterns. I have a slight case of synesthesia, which is a condition where people have a blending of senses. For example, I always see days of the week in color (and they are always the same colors). I always picture time and numbers in a type of grid, where I see myself physically positioned in that grid. This ability to “see time” (and almost feel it in a way) was an exceptional quality for getting stuff done. In a way my career in marketing was a perfect match, me with my innate sense of time and space, and marketing with all of its project management and deadlines.
My knowledge for exploring patterns is what attracted me to the world of Sociology. I always wanted to know more about the larger influences of our world — what drove groups to work together in cohesion, why did nations fall into socialism or fascism, what are the forces of media influence as technology explodes, or how one seemingly individual behavior like overeating is shaped by so many institutionalized societal policies.
I have always been drawn to the “bigger picture.” Now I need to explore this in a much deeper way, to see how I will fit into this expanded snapshot of my life.
I’m going to apply my synesthesia towards seeing myself in the world, in this new phase of my life. I already have a gift for seeing these patterns; now I need to ZOOM OUT and see my life at 100,000 feet and connect the dots on the grid. What patterns will I discover?
One that I have always known in my heart is that I am a writer. Marketing is rife with written communications, and writing was always my favorite part of my work. I graduated from college with honors because of my writing. I love to write poems (not ones that rhyme) because they can be short yet punctuated with so much raw emotion. In high school, I could “wing it” on any essay, often getting A’s with very little studying or reading of the topic at hand. When I was a young girl, I often wrote stories in my head, picturing the writing and words as I dreamed all kinds of dreams.
I can’t wait to explore my other life patterns, and dreams.